When was the last time you were
really annoyed by someone trying to give you the hard sell? For me it was just a week ago.
As you know, I work for myself and while my work making metal sculptures is physically demanding, it doesn't improve my aerobic fitness. Perhaps I need to take-up jogging with a metal sculpture or two held overhead! And I'm looking to get some routine in my life. Give me something that I
have to do each week.
So I visited a local gym, down the road from my workshop. I've driven by it many times and always said to myself that I would have to drop in sometime to have a look. When I finally did I thought I must be at a good gym because the car park was absolutely chockers and people were coming and going. It didn't feel like one of those dying gyms where there aren't any customers and the staff are pre-occupied doing their fingernails to keep from dying of boredom.
I introduced myself to the scarily fit young woman behind the counter, explained that I wanted to learn what the gym had to offer and find out costs, blah blah blah. And she asked me to fill-out a 'casual visit questionnaire' and to take a seat until one of the 'membership consultants' could talk with me. My hackles should have gone up at this point. The questionnaire requested not only the expected info like my name, contact details and so on, but also some things that you wouldn't be able to ask in a job interview in Australia like marital status, number of children... And there was a section about what level of fitness I figured I was at now, and what level I would like to be, and when would I like to be at this level. And please sign here.
I didn't sign anything. Thought all that was somewhat premature.
Then my 'membership consultant' arrived. Now this guy was NOT a good physical advertisement for the gym. Somewhat overweight, standing a bit too close to me for my comfort, tummy somewhat jutting out, shoulders back, and swaggering as he walked. BIG handshake and toothy smile. Gosh, 'friend', how long has it been?
This guy was a
really annoying salesman. I've been in sales. I was good at sales. My attitude towards sales is that a good sales person is helping the customer. No '104 Power Closes' and that kind of selling. He had all the tricks, try to get the customer to say 'yes' all the time so when it came time to 'close the sale' he would have me well primed to just say yes, sign me up for that premium membership for the next 40 years PLEASE! MAKE IT HAPPEN NOW!
He walked me through all the different gym rooms, showing the very impressive equipment. Go ahead, he said, try that stairwalker. Yep, it felt like walking up stairs to me. Here we are in another room, go ahead, hop on that treadmill! No, I said, I've been on one and know what it's like. Not the response he expected. Here, try the rowing machine. VERY MACHO! No thanks, I've tried one. How about the 'recumbent bicycle' says he pointing at the upright bicycle. I didn't have the heart to tell him that the recumbent bicycles are the ones you lie back in, not sit up on, and they were just farther down the room by the wonder. Was he trying to trick me?
Stand here and perve at the lycra ladies in the (many) mirrors. Well, okay, but just for a minute, I thought.
The facilities were impressive, but I didn't play his game - I just wouldn't commit to saying that 'yes, I can see myself here as a member, enjoying these fantastic facilities.' 'I just want to have a look and find-out what it costs,' I kept saying, and I don't have all day to do it, buddy!
So finally Mr. Membership Consultant seems to get the message and walks me back to the reception area, excuses himself to get the pricing package. Did I mention that his leather belt was the same babyshit yellow colour as his cowboy boots? Back he comes with a a couple of brochures and the clipboard with my filled-in info sheet. I did tell him a few times that my work was down the road and that's why I was looking at this gym. Not, as he said back to me a couple times, because I live in the area.
Why is this so hard, I'm thinking...
Another quick try to get me to commit to how quickly I want to get back into great aerobic fitness, what level I want to be at, how wonderful I will feel with more stamina (no nasal spray here, hint hint... think about the wife's happiness) less stress, and more energy... JUST HOW MUCH IS IT!?
Okay, he reluctantly opens the 'membership options' brochure, like we are about to exchange major cash for a large quantity of rare diamonds. There's a joining fee, and there's a non-refundable admin fee, and then there's the weekly gym fee. Yep, and how much is all that? YOU MUST BE KIDDING! You have to sign-up for how long?
Hang on, he says. Leans forward to share the big secret (because I'm special, I'm sure) 'there are a few specials from last month that I might be able to extend - if you think you can decide today...' WTF! No one is deciding anything today bucko!
He didn't seem to hear me the first few times that I said that I was only just starting to look at gyms, this is the first one I've visited, and I just want to see what they have and what it costs.
No worries, but he
might be able to save me money if I was interested in a non peak membership. Meaning that you can use the gym when no one else wants to. But he'd have to check with his manager first.
I had a real hard time suppressing a good laugh at that one! Crikey, I thought, did he think I was buying a car or something? It's only a bloody gym membership! So I declined his very kind offer (I am special, you know, he wouldn't offer it to just anyone off the street.) And we let his manager continue resting in the office, undisturbed from making significant decisions like this.
So finally he let me go. Was it my body language that was giving him the message that it really wasn't working for me? Did I have any other limbs that I could cross... Nope. I was fully crossed!
So, when can I call you, a couple days? he asked. No thanks, I'll call you, I said. A quick handshake and I'm out of there. And quickly, too.
Jeez, doesn't the gym management know what a turn-off that experience is? Or is more likely that if I felt like that, yet the gym is full of customers, that I would be the one out of place in that gym?
Am I going back? I don't think so... EFM is looking pretty good right now!
And the funny thing is that salespeople are the easiest people to sell to, if the person doing the selling is any good. I love good sales people! Give me a good one and I would probably buy just about anything from them. Conversely, bad sales people really, really annoy me now.
And no, let me put it on the record now - I don't want a free mobile phone with nothing to sign and no contracts. So go back to your call centre and leave me alone!
